11-17-2011, 07:44 AM
Game Warden: "Fishing?"
Man without a license:
"No. Drowning worms."
Man without a license:
"No. Drowning worms."
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What's the difference between a hunter and a
fisherman?
A hunter lies in wait. A fisherman waits and lies.
fisherman?
A hunter lies in wait. A fisherman waits and lies.
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Why is going to a meeting of the Bar Association
like going into a bait shop?
Because of the abundance of suckers, leeches,
maggots and nightcrawlers.
like going into a bait shop?
Because of the abundance of suckers, leeches,
maggots and nightcrawlers.
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A hunter was crossing a road one day when a frog
called out to him and said, "If you kiss me, I'll turn into a beautiful
princess." He bent over, picked up the frog and put it in his pocket.
The
frog spoke up again and said, "If you kiss me and turn me back into a beautiful
Princess, I will stay with you for one week."
The hunter took the frog
out of his pocket, smiled at it and returned it to the pocket. The frog then
cried out, "If you kiss me and turn me back into a Princess, I'll stay with you
and do anything you want."
Again the hunter took the frog out, smiled at
it and put it back into his pocket.
Finally the frog asked, "What is it?
I've told you I'm a beautiful Princess, that I'll stay with you for a week and
do anything you want. Why won't you kiss me?"
The hunter said, "Look, I'm
a avid hunter and when I'm not hunting, I'm fishing, so I don't have time for
girlfriends, but a talking frog is really cool!"
called out to him and said, "If you kiss me, I'll turn into a beautiful
princess." He bent over, picked up the frog and put it in his pocket.
The
frog spoke up again and said, "If you kiss me and turn me back into a beautiful
Princess, I will stay with you for one week."
The hunter took the frog
out of his pocket, smiled at it and returned it to the pocket. The frog then
cried out, "If you kiss me and turn me back into a Princess, I'll stay with you
and do anything you want."
Again the hunter took the frog out, smiled at
it and put it back into his pocket.
Finally the frog asked, "What is it?
I've told you I'm a beautiful Princess, that I'll stay with you for a week and
do anything you want. Why won't you kiss me?"
The hunter said, "Look, I'm
a avid hunter and when I'm not hunting, I'm fishing, so I don't have time for
girlfriends, but a talking frog is really cool!"
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Doreen's husband Matt died suddenly one day. Doreen was taking care of the
funeral arrangements with the undertaker when she was asked how she wanted
Matt's obituary to read.
Doreen asked the undertaker, "How much does an
obituary cost?"
The undertaker replied, "One dollar per word
funeral arrangements with the undertaker when she was asked how she wanted
Matt's obituary to read.
Doreen asked the undertaker, "How much does an
obituary cost?"
The undertaker replied, "One dollar per word
Doreen then said, "I want the obituary to read - MATT IS DEAD."
The
undertaker was an old fishing buddy of Matt's and he was a little disturbed by
such a curt obituary, so he offered, "I'll make you a special deal since I knew
Matt so well. I'll pay for half of the obituary out of my own pocket."
Doreen's face lit up and she replied, "Great. I want it to read - MATT IS DEAD,
BOAT FOR SALE."
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A man was stopped by a game warden in Northern Minnesota recently with two
buckets of fish leaving a lake well known for its fishing. The game warden asked
the man, "Do you have a license to catch those fish?"
The man replied to
the game warden, "No, sir. These are my pet fish."
"Pet fish?!" the
warden replied.
"Yes, sir. Every night I take these fish down to the lake
and let them swim around for a while. I whistle and they jump back into their
buckets, and I take em home."
"That's a bunch of hooey! Fish can't do
that!"
The man looked at the game warden for a moment, and then said,
"Here, I'll show you. It really works."
"O.K. I've GOT to see this!" the
game warden replied.
The man poured the fish in to the water and stood
and waited. After several minutes, the game warden turned to the man and said,
"Well?"
"Well, what?" the man asked.
"When are you going to call
them back?" the game warden prompted.
"Call who back?" the man
asked.
"The FISH."
"What fish?" the man asked.
buckets of fish leaving a lake well known for its fishing. The game warden asked
the man, "Do you have a license to catch those fish?"
The man replied to
the game warden, "No, sir. These are my pet fish."
"Pet fish?!" the
warden replied.
"Yes, sir. Every night I take these fish down to the lake
and let them swim around for a while. I whistle and they jump back into their
buckets, and I take em home."
"That's a bunch of hooey! Fish can't do
that!"
The man looked at the game warden for a moment, and then said,
"Here, I'll show you. It really works."
"O.K. I've GOT to see this!" the
game warden replied.
The man poured the fish in to the water and stood
and waited. After several minutes, the game warden turned to the man and said,
"Well?"
"Well, what?" the man asked.
"When are you going to call
them back?" the game warden prompted.
"Call who back?" the man
asked.
"The FISH."
"What fish?" the man asked.
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What's the difference between beer nuts and deer nuts?
Beer Nuts
are around a dollar seventy-nine, and deer nuts are just under a buck!
Beer Nuts
are around a dollar seventy-nine, and deer nuts are just under a buck!